Henry: You kissed my mom?
Emma: Henry, not now…
Henry: My mom. You kissed her. On the mouth. You. Oh. My. God.
Emma: Now Henry, I know you’re pretty sheltered. But sometimes two women can be attracted to each other just the same as—
Henry: It’s not that you’re women. She’s my mom. And so are you.
Regina: (coming back into the room) Miss Swan? I managed to get rid of Kathryn so I have another half hour if you want to—
Regina: Henry. I’m so glad you’re here.
Henry: Mom, you kissed my mom!
Regina: (wryly) Okay, a little less glad. Henry, listen—
Henry: This isn’t even the first time, is it?
Emma: Kid, it’s not what you think.
Henry: Did you kiss my mom? You… motherkisser? Then it’s exactly what I think.
Regina: I told you this was a terrible idea.
Henry: Don’t blame her! I saw you grabbing her butt.
Emma: Oh god. Archie’s gonna own your house by the time we pay for all the therapy.
Regina: Well, you certainly don’t have any assets.
Emma: Hey, don’t start with me. You’re the one who called me over here on some goddamned booty—
Henry: Wait a minute, you like each other?
Regina & Emma: No.
Henry: You do. You totally do. Oh God, this was in my book. Why didn’t I see it before?
Emma: What was?
Henry: The White Knight’s story, and the Evil Queen’s story, both end with them meeting their true love. But they’re the only stories where that Trule Love isn’t named.
Regina: Henry, I know your book is very detailed, but there are some things you don’t understand…
Henry: I understand plenty. And this makes me forgive you both. About the kissing. Which is pretty gross and I never want to see it again, okay?
Emma: Aye aye, cap’n.
Regina: This is ridiculous. (off Henry’s glare) Fine, fine.
Emma: See? I told you he’d come around sooner rather than later.
Regina: Shut up.
Henry: So who’s taking me for ice cream? Because after all that trauma, I’m totally getting ice cream.
Emma: I think we both are, right?
Regina: Right. But I’m driving.